Saturday, July 3, 2010

Listen with your....eyes.



I recall a certain Sunday morning breakfast, that took place many years ago. I was enjoying a cup of "morning wake up" coffee (actually, most likely a series of cups of coffee) and reading the morning paper as we sat around the breakfast table.

Our youngest, Jamie, was sitting next to me. At the time, he was about 4 years old.
(He is pictured at left, at approximately that age).

Jamie wanted to tell me something, and said "Daddy, listen to me."
Without bothering to put down the paper, I replied "I AM listening, Jamie..". He replied, "Daddy, listen with your eyes!".

He wasn't satisfied with just a little passing attention. He needed full frontal, in your face, eye contact. He craved and deserved to have my full attention, not just a little sliver of my still somwehat sleepy brain. He launched a little dagger, straight to my heart. There apparently remains to this day some scar tissue of regret from the wound that little dagger inflicted on my heart.

I did put down the paper, and, looking him squarely in the eyes I said "Okay, Jamie, I am listening..." (with my ears, my eyes, AND my brain).

James (f.k.a "Jamie") moved away this week. Out of the house, out of town, and away from our direct influence.

Jackie and I are now, officially, 'empty nesters', for the first time. Empty Nesters. Kind of a 'bittersweet' feeling.

We've had other times when all three kids were out of the house, but it was different as they were away at school or some situation where we knew that they would return home to live. But this is different, as all the childhood bedrooms have been vacated...and the old school days memorabilia for each of the three has been boxed up and put in the store room (no doubt, to be thrown away at some later date).

But as I wax nostalgic on the 'good old days' of having the kids at home, I wonder how many times I didn't "listen with my eyes" to each of the kids. I regret any times they didn't get my full attention, because they always deserved that and so much more.

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